You can have the love you want:

The power of affirmation and visualization

If you have been reading self-empowerment or self-development books, chances are you have heard about affirmations and visualization. In sales and marketing, these principles are widely taught to help the revenue producers achieve their goals. But even if you are not even remotely connected to sales, you can still use the power of affirmation and visualization manifest the things that you desire in your life- including the kind of love that you feel you deserve.

Say ”I am beautiful“ and believe it

Look at yourself in the mirror and say out loud ”I am beautiful!“

How did you feel?

Did you feel natural doing it? Did you feel a positive urge of energy running through you? Most of all, did you believe what you said?

Or did you feel a lump in your throat form as if an inner voice is saying, ”Get real!!“ Did you feel vain, narcissistic or you can’t simply figure out how you feel, but you know it did not feel right?

If you are uncomfortable saying, ”I am beautiful“ to yourself, you are not alone. A lot of us have trouble with this. Most societies and cultures do not advocate praising yourself; if you do this, you will be regarded as vain, proud and full of yourself.  If a little girl stares at herself in the mirror and say ”I am beautiful“, chances are, her mother (unless she is an advocate of positive thoughts herself) would censure her.

Growing up, the child learns that she shouldn’t say this. If she tries when she’s older, she is fighting with all the negative thoughts in her mind. It is like trying to get rid of old chewing gum stuck under your shoe. If you are in this state, you would do well to go back to that section on ”believe you are worthy“. Starting with positive affirmations like ”I like myself“ every morning can ease your graduation to ”I am beautiful“.

The beauty that I am talking about here is not the beauty of ”supermodel“ and ”cover girl types. Of course, if you are blessed with such physical gifts, you are lucky. After all, being gorgeous never hurts. What I am talking about here is the beauty that emanates from you. No matter how you look like there is beauty inside you that is waiting to be released. Believe me, I am not just trying to be kind to the less endowed.

Have you ever wondered why some women whom you considered as ”borderline“ cases (short for almost ugly, and you were being kind) manage to get their fair share of attention from men? How often have you seen an ”unattractive woman“ in your standards being showered with so much love and attention by a man who wouldn’t even give you a second look?

I have often wondered about the mystique of these women myself. But now I think I have found the reason for their ”attraction“. They are not beautiful (by the usual standards) but they radiate beauty!  They believe they are beautiful beings that deserve the best in life.  They are happy with themselves. Their looks aren’t perfect but their confidence and ”no hang-up“ approach to life attracts men. The positive energy that this self-confidence brings is infections. Remember that the world is your mirror. It simply reflects the way you feel about yourself.

You can radiate the same kind of beauty by building it up within yourself. Try saying ”I am beautiful“ while smiling to yourself in the mirror and before you retire to bed. Do this while appreciating the features that you like in your face, in your body.

I shared this ”I am beautiful“ exercise with a friend who has been overweight for some time. After a few weeks of doing affirmations, she was pleasantly surprised when her friends and colleagues started saying she was glowing and she looked younger. Some even said she was sexy, despite her weight.

After you have become comfortable with telling yourself you are beautiful, you can gradually ease into using affirmations as part of your daily life. You can add other things to say apart from ” I am beautiful“. You can start saying, ”I am fit and healthy“ if you want to lose weight. A good friend who believes in the power of affirmations swears by saying, ”I look 10 years younger than my age“ as the secret to her very youthful looks.