Believe that you are worthy
To attract good love into your life, you must believe that you deserve it and nothing less will be acceptable to you. This is where your self-image and self-esteem come in. No matter how hard you try to have positive thoughts (example, attracting good love, health, prosperity, relationship), if deep inside you, you feel inadequate and undeserving, you will have difficulty attracting the good into your life. Beliefs such as, ”I really don’t deserve this“, ”I would not know how to handle it if I get it“, ”This is what I deserve“, negate all your positive thoughts. And like all your negative thoughts, they also become self-fulfilling prophecies.
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Psychologists say that our self-esteem is shaped at the age of five. At this age, you naturally become more assertive and active. Your family’s reactions to the choices you made were important in shaping your self-image. If they encouraged your efforts, applauding your successes, you learned that you could carry things out successfully. If they discouraged your efforts and you were often criticized and punished, you learned that taking the initiative isn’t the best thing to do. If you grew up in this kind of environment, you turn out to be indecisive, or you hide your talents, or you blame yourself when things go wrong. It isn’t just your family that determines how you look at yourself. Your friends, all the positive and the negative things, events that happen in your life all help shape your self-esteem.
Having a positive self-esteem should not be confused with being self-centered, being a braggart or acting superior. Far from being healthy, these are attempts to hide negative feelings of self.
What can you do to improve your self-esteem?
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One way to improve your self-esteem is to take conscious control of your self-talk. These are the things that you constantly say to yourself, as well as the meanings you attach to the events that happen in your life.
”I look horrible.“
”I am so fat. I will never lose weight.“
”Nobody wants me.“
Thoughts and words like these are very destructive and self-defeating. Notice that people who constantly say these things to themselves live a life that is a reflection of their self-talk.
One excellent way to overcome negative self-talk is to use positive affirmations. Say things to yourself like:
”I like myself.“
”I am happy with myself.“
”I am a positive person and I live a positive life.“
”I am a wonderful person and I deserve to be loved.“
”I love myself and I accept love, peace, happiness into my life“
Repeat these words to yourself throughout the day. You can write then down and read them to yourself several times a day. Better still, say them out loud to yourself. Say them with enthusiasm, feeling the positive emotions surging through your body.
You can even go one step forward and record yourself speaking, with some soothing music in the background. Then play this tape when you sleep or whenever there is opportunity. You will be amazed at how this simple exercise can dramatically change the way you feel about yourself.
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